Jeff and the not-so-friendly Jumbo

It wasn’t on primetime news, so you’ve probably not heard about Animal Planet’s Jeff Corwin’s near-fatal brush with a Cambodian elephant. Yup, Corwin almost became Irwin when a Jumbo “tossed him like a ragdoll” during the filming of a show hosted by CNN’s Anderson Cooper. Amazingly, Corwin escaped with every bone intact.

The incident was caught on tape and is even now available on YouTube (of course).



I had the pleasure of meeting the man some three years back when Animal Planet actually flew me all the way to Taipei for an interview.

I must say that unlike the hyper Ian Wright, Corwin was a pretty calm and quiet man. He answered my questions with a lot of thought and was polite and proper throughout the chat.

And for someone who spends most of his time in the deepest jungles imaginable, the dude looked pretty well-groomed. And he didn’t smell at all!

The next day though I got to see a different side of him. We took the same van to go to this café to launch his new program, and he turned out to be a cool dude after all. A big film fan, Corwin was spewing movie trivia throughout the entire trip with a few impersonations thrown in.

But I remember he was a bit fussy with his Starbucks coffee…

Excerpts of the interview from the March ’04 issue of NewMan magazine:

Do you have anything against the circus?
Yes, I do. I don’t have a problem with the concept of a circus. What I have a problem with is exploiting wildlife for entertainment. Especially when there’s a level of suffering for the animals. I don’t think monkeys should be on roller skates and orangutans shouldn’t be in human clothes.

What do you miss most when you’re deep in the jungles?
My family – my wife and seven-month-old baby daughter. But I travel with a great crew and we have a lot of fun too. We’re like family on the road.

What was your reaction when you found out that you were named one of People magazine’s 50 Most Beautiful People?
It was cool cos that took the subjects of nature and animals to the forefront. I’m not an actor or a movie star; I’m a biologist! And to make biology beautiful or sexy for a day was rather cool, but I think you have to keep things in perspective.

What sort of pets do you have at home?
I have a cat. And that’s it.

Tabloid Tales : Starring ghouls, minxes and horses

I’m kicking off this edition with some excellent news from Mingguan Warta Perdana. The folks in Pantai Remis, Perak can sleep better now cos the goblin that’s been haunting them has been caught by Buffy The Vampire Slayer. Ha ha! Not really. Buffy’s been off air for a few years already, so there’s no way she could have done this.

Anyway, it was a slightly unsexier pawang who caught the little rascal which has now been placed in a mayonnaise jar (I’m guessing here). The excellent-er news? You can catch a glimpse of this “jembalang”, and a host of other weird beings (politicians not included, though) at an exhibition in Central Market.

And here’s the headline of the fortnight courtesy of Mingguan Warga Kota…

I'm speechless, really. But I have to say that this particular issue is packed with the best kind of sleaze you can imagine. From reports of female undergrads providing “khidmat power”(powerful service?), to transvestites using black magic to lure married men into their bed, this is the kind of read that will leave you wondering, “How come I’m not getting any action myself?” Kidding!

And while an English newspaper was suspended (ahem) for merely mentioning Malaysians’ favourite positions in the sack (which we’re all well aware of, right?), this tabloid actually describes in great detail how to execute the Top 3 positions, “Gaya Kepiting”, “Dok-al-Arz” and the imaginatively-named “Gaya Kuda” (Horse Style). A must-read indeed for those who still don’t quite know how to make the best of certain “spots” and “zones”.

If that’s not enough, Bacaria has 14 more tips specially researched for the ladies by one Diva Lady Armani.

Pick of the tips? Avoid touching the weak spots on your hubby’s body, ladies. Instead, focus on other parts such as “dada, puting atau lengannya yang sasa.” (chest, nipples or his bulging biceps)

Guys, get cracking on those bicep curls already…

Tabloid Tales (every fortnight)

Welcome to this brand spanking new column where I put the trash out for your general amusement.

And what better way to kick things off than a bit on the King of Kulai himself, Mawi. A mere kapchai owner a couple of years back, the dude now has a fleet of cars, including a Kia Optima and a Naza Sorento, at his disposal. The only hitch? He’s got no driver’s license!



Well folks, we can all stop losing sleep over it now cos according to Mingguan Perdana, Mawi is getting his driver’s license any day now. And the move has drawn a positive reaction from JPJ itself, although it came with a warning: “If the dude drives without a license anyway, we’re gonna make him sing at our annual dinner. For the next 10 years.” I’m kidding, of course.

Now, here’s some great news for those into headless Japanese soldiers! According to Mingguan Misteri, folks from a kampung in Bahau, Negri Sembilan have had various encounters with Mr Yamatakmatilagi. Even more chilling is the fact that this particular soldier can assume various forms (ala the bad Terminators in those Arnie movies) including the run-of-the-mill lembaga hitam (yawn) and, believe it or not, a hot babe. But no, it wasn’t Maya Karin, ok?


And here’s the headline of the fortnight…


Yup. In big, bold font is the word ‘coli’. Right there on the front-page. No prizes for guessing what the story’s all about. But here’s the latest twist on Linda Onn-gate as exposed by Bacaria.

Apparently, the reason she refused to wear that controversial skin colour Kebaya was because she only brought pink and black bras (ahem), and those wouldn’t match well with the dress.

And we all know how hard it is to find a pair of new bras in Hollywood, don’t we?